Archive for the ‘Current Affairs’ Category

#ShitGate #NewYorkJets
 
Doing the ‘Math’
 
The New York Jets – who fly into London this morning for tomorrow’s Wembley Stadium clash with NFL opponents, Miami Dolphins – are to bring with them 350 toilet rolls following reports of bad British plumbing and “thin” loo-paper.
;
BBCNYJETS
 
I can understand their apprehension as news of Osborne’s needless austerity measures spread across the pond, but I’ll admit to lacking somewhat in the comprehension department when it comes to the sheer numbers involved here.
 
Okay, let’s take a deep breath and take a lead from our American cousin’s and try and ‘do the math’:
 
On the pitch, an American football team (yes, that’s what they call it) has eleven players. On the road I might imagine taking perhaps ten substitutes for an away game. I envisage we can then add another five for team management and maybe a further five comprising medical and admin’.
 
Let’s be even more generous and throw in a masseur and two pole-dancers.
 
Together with the ‘Intern’ who ‘blew the gaff’ on our pathetic sanitary arrangements, that’s a total travelling contingent of thirty-five citizens of the most powerful nation on earth.
 
Continuing with our renown British generosity we can call today (fly-in) and Monday (fly-out) as whole days, so together with tomorrow’s match-day the entirety of the Yankee invasion will last three days.
 
Thirty-five people, three days, three hundred and fifty loo rolls.
 
That’s a personal loo-roll (PLR) allocation of ten rolls over three days or 3.33 rolls per-person-per-day.
 
If we were to be rather unkind and class today and Monday as ‘half days’, then the PLR allocation would rise to 5.0.
 
Just how much shit are these Americans expecting to get through?
 
I do hope they’ve considered bringing their own shovels. I’m sure their Intern will no-doubt have told them, ours are being used to bury our ‘Fit for Work‘ dead.
 
Anvil Springstien.
 
 

#ToryTurkeys #TWATS

Breaking News – This Just In…

Tory ‘Turkey Farms’ to be up and running in time for Christmas says deputy chairman, Rob Halfon.

Tory Turkeys

Anvil Springstien.

Original News Article: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-34407971

#JezWeCan #NationalAnthem #ProsperityThroughPoverty #BattleOfBritain

bob

Lest We Forget

On the day when Prime Ministers Questions may prove to be the most interesting in years, in a week when an opposition leadership election forced a sitting prime minister to rapidly shoot off, somewhat Madonna-like, to visit poor people in the Lebanon, (I’m surprised he didn’t bring a brown baby back for the obvious photo-opportunity exiting the plane at Heathrow) we have the Murdoch press screaming like small schoolchildren at a birthday party, “Miss, Miss, Corbyn’s not singing!”

Apparently Jeremy Corbyn has ‘snubbed’ our glorious monarch by ‘refusing’ to mouth the words of the national anthem during the Battle of Britain memorial service whilst the entire Tory party, nay, the entire nation were standing to attention in front of their television sets, saluting and bellowing for all they were worth.

No doubt young Liz will have been in tears at Jeremy’s ‘snubbing’ on this her special occasion.

Another day in her long reign ruined by that selfish boy at the front.

What nonsense.

Someone ought to remind Murdoch, Cameron, and Tory MP Sir Nicholas Soames (the grandson of Winston Churchill no less) that the national anthem – sung or respectfully listened to – is not about the Queen and hasn’t been for quite some time. It is not like singing ‘Happy Birthday to You’. We are no longer subjects of an omnipotent Monarch sent by a powerful god to rule over us.

If we do sing the national anthem – or merely choose to allow that thankfully short melody to wash over us – say on an Olympic podium or before representing our country in a World Cup – it is because we associate it with membership of a collective entity or endeavour, namely England, Northern Ireland, Scotland, Wales, the United Kingdom, Great Britain, the North East, or what have you.

That the words, like the figurehead herself, are anachronistic are neither here nor there – it is what they represent.

Likewise yesterday’s remembrance ceremony was not there to celebrate Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. It was to remember the sacrifice that young men and women gave in the fight against fascism and corporatism during the Second World War. A sacrifice that allowed the survivors of this conflict to return home to a land ‘fit for heroes’.

A land which would enact legislation upon their return – promised legislation – that would bring about a National Health Service, build homes, and develop a Welfare State that would reflect this collective endeavour from ‘the cradle to the grave’.

A land which would act like a beacon to the civilised world in how it treated its citizens, its old, its ill and its poor.

These are the very collective endeavour and ideals that Murdoch and Cameron wish to consign to the dustbin of history. The very collective endeavour and ideals that Corbyn and his supporters seek to rekindle in a nation that has had the product of this endeavour taken from it and placed securely into the bank accounts of the rich and the few.

It is a sad day when those that seek the imposition of a neo-liberal corporatist ideology that is more akin to the fascism that this nation fought against in those dark days when she stood alone, are those very same people that demand we wave the flag and beat the drum of petty nationalism.

It is a disgrace both to the memory of those who fought in World War II, and to the ideals that many in our families were to pay the ultimate sacrifice for.

Anvil Springstien.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-the-papers-34265028

[image: Battle of Britain Memorial Trust]

#JezWeCan #JezWeDid #LizLuvsJez

jcpointing

Jeremy Corbyn allows an ant to crawl along his finger to freedom

A revolution of sorts

Was it really only a few short weeks ago that a handful of British Labour Party MP’s were persuaded, for the sake of debate, to back Jeremy Corbyn as an outside candidate in the party leadership election? It feels like an age. Back then you could have put money on him at 500/1. I didn’t. I do hope some people did. Three months and exactly one hundred packed-out meetings later Jeremy Corbyn is announced as the new leader of the UK Labour Party.

A revolution, of sorts, had occurred. After his initial nomination I’d written encouraging a vote for Corbyn as we were desperately in need of:

“… an effective vocal opposition to these far-right policies that are strangling our economy and destroying the future of our children. We need this opposition where it is most effective – in parliament. We don’t have it, we haven’t had it for years, and we won’t have it for years to come unless we do something, now.

An effective vocal opposition in parliament needs to have a viable alternative to this neo-conservative ideology that is something more than the austerity top trumps we’ve put up with so far. We don’t have that alternative, we haven’t had it for years, and we won’t have it for years to come unless we do something, now. Right now!”

I continued with my rant…

“As you ponder on your decision to act, Rupert Murdock will tell you this viable alternative is ‘Hard Left’, ‘Socialist’, ‘Stalinist’, ‘Marxist’, ‘Maoist’, ‘Communist’, ‘Trotskyist’ or whatever negative label they might think will dissuade you from acting to instigate change. Yet any passing analysis of these policies show that they are in fact little removed from what used to be called the ‘centre ground’ in British politics. They are in fact little removed from what, not long ago, you might hear emanating from the mouth of any ‘one-nation Tory’ with a leaning towards compassionate Keynesian economics.”

As the press – including, sadly, the progressive titles, did precisely this, the Labour Party dragged out its grandees to warn the faithful of the errors of shifting the party to the ‘extreme left’. It didn’t work. We didn’t believe them, and we didn’t believe the press, either. Stunned, they looked on, and in, as Corbyn rallies filled to overflowing. People began to join (in my case re-join) the party in order to vote for him. A momentum had been achieved that would prove to be unstoppable.

Jeremy Corbyn – as predicted by me – was now bigger than Jason Donavon.

Many on the far right – unable to be seen to be affecting the election – sniggered on the sidelines and joked that they would join the Labour Party to vote for Corbyn thereby making Labour unelectable for decades. A few of them no doubt managed to do exactly that. It’s uncertain as to what effect, if any, they had on the outcome. One thing is certain, however: they’re not laughing now.

Aware of the groundswell that is Corbynism, all of a sudden they are deadly serious.

Their response came within minutes of the party election results. It is a response that encompasses what they now perceive as an existential threat to their hold on power. They are about to unleash a powerful weapon. A weapon that is easy to see – but difficult to defend against. At its base is the mystical number 3.

The Power of Three

Any budding comedian learns fairly early on that – unless it’s the quantity of tickets sold – ‘three’ really is a magic number: In the structure of a joke, one punchline, or ‘tag,’ can be funny; two tags often less so; three tags most times funnier than both. This ‘rule of three’ works in comedic set structure, too, and it’s the reason plays, stories and movies are built around three acts. Well, at least the ones that work are.

It’s also the reason speech writers and spin doctors will sit for hours trying to find a sufficiently powerful third noun or adjective for whatever tub-thumper they are writing for. It is never sufficient for a king or pope to have mere humility, he must have humility, integrity, and honesty. Of course he may well turn out to be arrogant, deceitful, and dishonest, They usually do, but hey, in both cases the rule of three will give the description more efficacy, and make it more memorable to the listener. More believable. It is why the rule of three is often referred to as the ‘power’ of three.

Of course punters, listeners, viewers and readers are mostly oblivious to the power of three. They are often astounded when it is pointed out to them just how much of our lives beat to its mystical rhythm. Start them off with ‘I Came, I Saw, I Conquered’, and expect a deluge of ‘Blood, Sweat and Tears’, ‘Friends, Romans, Countrymen’ ‘Work, Rest and Play’. Mention a movie title, ‘The Good the Bad, and the Ugly’, or a children’s book: ‘The Three Billy Goats Gruff’, and expect the same.

It can be fun as a parlor game. Participants happily unaware of the dynamite emanating from their lips.

Politicians, however, use the power of three to great effect and when mixed with the constant repetition of a specific word it becomes a powerful weapon of persuasion – regardless of its truth content. Who can forget the wonderfully successful ‘Education, Education, Education’ – its positive spin unfailing in its effect on me even as the recipients of said policy can now barely spell the very word.

In the immediate moments following the Labour Party leadership election, before the Kendall love-spittle had barely dried upon the beard of The Chosen One, it became obvious that the Tory government had been hard at work developing a response to what they perceived as the imminent landslide victory of Marxist-Leninism. The blunderbuss approach would be left to the press – this reaction needed to be sharp, focused, and yet cover a large amount of ground without loitering on specific policy details that could encourage dangerous debate.

The first two faceless MP’s to grace the screens following the result parroted what must have taken most of the previous day to work through. I can’t remember their names and have no desire to. Interviewed at different locations across London within minutes of one another they spat out more or less the same verbatim message:

“This man is a threat to national security.

This man is a threat to the economy.

This man is a threat to your family”.

This is their response laid bare. This is their strategy to combat the danger of a viable and vocal opposition in parliament. These three simple phrases will be repeated ad infinitum over the next days, weeks and months in order to indelibly paint the image of Corbyn as the new ‘enemy within’. It is a powerful weapon that we will hear ricocheting across bars, pubs, workplaces and living rooms throughout the country.

Fortunately it also shows us where they need to be attacked: Our borders have never been so insecure. Our economy struggles to grow under austerity whilst the few make millions at the expense of the many. ‘Prosperity through Poverty’ they shout. Our families – the old, the young, the disabled, the homeless, the ill, the employed and the unemployed, the teachers and the taught, the unionised and the thousands on zero-hours contracts – are all affected by this governments disgraceful and inhumane policies.

It is they that are a threat to our nations security. They that are a threat to our economy. They that are a threat to our families. It is they that are the extremists. It is they that are a threat to us all.

Arm yourselves, my pretties… As the song says, ‘There’s a time to speak and the time is now.’

Gonna’ be an interesting week.

Anvil Springstien.

ps: Big hugs to Liz Kendall – who I have been slagging mercilessly – for her obvious joy and excitement at Jeremy’s victory. Good onya, Liz. The other two looked like they had faces like the proverbial slapped arses.

kendall

…and the following day:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hgJokgNJHo

That’s ‘National Security’ out of the way… expect the other two to be along shortly.

… and here not three hours later from the Horse’s Mouth:

cameron tweet

#TwatShaming

Kim-davis-rowan-county-clerk1

Kim Davis.
4 times married. 3 times divorcee.
Clerk, Rowan County, Kentucky.
Twat.

Anvil Springstien.

Loosely Related: TwatShaming #1

[#‎KiyiyaVuranInsanlik‬ ‪#‎HumanityWashedAshore‬ ‪#‎Swarming #AylanKurdi]

This is an update from an earlier post dated 27th May 2015. It references the image – now viral world-wide on social-media – of the body of a dead infant, Alan Kurdi, who, along with his mother and five year old brother, were drowned in their attempt to escape the conflict in Syria.

Waiting for words…

I’ve been staring at a photo released a while ago by the United Nations Relief and Works Agency (UNRWA). I’ve been doing this every other day or so for quite some time now . It’s a shot taken at Yarmuk Refugee epa04101663 An undated handout picture made available on 26 February 2014 by the United Nation Relief and Works Agency (UNRWA) shows Palestinian and Syrian residents of Yarmuk Palestinian Refugee Camp crowding in a destroyed street as food is distributed, in Damascus, Syria. EPA/United Nation Relief and Works Agency / HANDOUT HANDOUT EDITORIAL USE ONLY/NO SALEScamp, Damascus. If you’re American, that’s in Syria, which is in the Middle East. Men and Women – Palestinians (and no doubt Syrians now, too) are queuing for food in a street devastated by the conflict.

They are orderly, static, unmoving – yet they appear as a river, a torrent of humanity coursing through the destruction of war.

The reason I’m staring at this photograph is that I’m waiting. Waiting for words.

Imagery often has the power to move us, and in the above instance – for myself at least – I am reminded of that singularly iconic image of the horrors of modern warfare: the young Vietnamese girl, Phan Thị Kim Phúc, napalmed by South Vietnamese forces in 1972. TrangBang.jpg

AP photographer Nick Ut took that now infamous shot which won him a Pulitzer and changed both his and Kim Phúc’s lives. In a way it changed many of our lives, too. Certainly mine. It’s an image I will carry with me to my grave. I still cannot hear or read the word, ‘Vietnam‘ – even on the now ubiquitous holiday adverts for that very country – without my mind conjuring Nick’s image of Kim Phúc. Oddly, the resolution seems only to sharpen rather than diminish with age.

I’d have dreaded being asked to pen a by-line for it – wouldn’t you? What words would you use? What words would suffice? What words could do justice to it? How long would you wait for them to arrive?

I fear my inadequacy as a writer would be held bare for all to see.

Perhaps there really are no words to describe such an image? Perhaps the image itself is all that is needed?

I’d just about come to this very conclusion with regard to the UNRWA shot – possibly to excuse my own failings: The more I stared at it the more I knew I didn’t possess the words, the skill, or the imagination to write anything that could possibly accompany it. Doomed to simply stare daily at the incomprehensible savagery of it all.

Defeated and feeling somewhat inadequate, I went to close the image-viewer for the umpteenth time. As I did so the wires pinged on my screen with the headline “Tony Blair resigns as Middle East Envoy.”

At that moment I knew that the image didn’t need a description, it merely required placing its instant – its moment – into its wider, greater context.

Nick Ut had The New York Times to position his shot left and centre to the heart of the Vietnam conflict. In our age of information overkill the UNRWA image seemed lost. Waiting for words that would never come. Not from me at least.

Then…

Tony Blair resigns as Middle East Envoy“.

It said it all.

Swarming

swarming

I’d written the above earlier this year after being shocked by the the UNRWA image.

Last night I was aware that news editors world-wide were making a decision to use (or otherwise) an image (see left) that has gone viral on social-media over the last twelve hours or so.

It’s an image that will no-doubt generate millions of words yet, as with the the other images above, needs few. I’ve chosen one: ‘Swarming’

:

Anvil Springstien.

:

:

NOTES:

ACTION:

Sign The Petition:

One small thing you can do is sign – and share – this petition. The link will also supply you with the email address of your local Member of Parliament (via your postcode). Over 100,00 people have signed this petition so far today.

https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/105991

Share The Images:

People ought to see these images. They should be shown side by side. The photograph from Vietnam was almost never shown because of prudery regarding the showing of nudity. A friend just messaged me regarding the debate surrounding publication:

‘What gives us the right to turn our gaze away when others have no choice but to see it’.

I agree.

There are links below.

EXPLAINER: 

Had a few emails from non-UK residents regarding the word ‘Swarming‘.

The reference is to a response to the ‘migrant‘ crisis from UK prime minister, David Cameron at the end of July:

“(Y)ou have got a swarm of people coming across the Mediterranean, seeking a better life, wanting to come to Britain because Britain has got jobs, it’s got a growing economy, it’s an incredible place to live”.

The head of advocacy for The Refugee Council, Dr Lisa Doyle, condemned Cameron’s language.

“It’s extremely disappointing to hear the prime minister using such irresponsible, dehumanising language to describe the desperate men, women and children fleeing for their lives across the Mediterranean Sea.

IMAGES:

Click on thumbnail or HERE for the SWARMING image – full screen.

Click on thumbnail or HERE for the UNRWA image – full-screen

Click HERE for the Original ‘Blair resigns…’ post

Thumbnail image © Nick Ut / The Associated Press 1972

UNRWA image © United Nations Relief and Works Agency 2014

Swarming image © As Yet Unknown / TBC

All images are used under ‘Fair Use’ rationale. No copyright infringement is intended.